“I think there probably should be a rule that if you’re talking about how many loaves of bread a bullet will go through, it’s understood that you mean lengthwise loaves. Otherwise, it makes no sense.” -Jack Handey, American humorist and creator of the infamous Mike Nesmith-narrated ‘Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey‘ sketches on Saturday Night Live

The holidays this year were slated to go down a certain way for those of us in the New York City area.  That is, until a giant blizzard monster descended upon us with entirely different plans in mind.

“Muahahahaaaaa, you think you’re leaving tomorrow,” the blizzard monster told my sister as she optimistically packed her family up for the return flight home to Los Angeles, “but soon my wrath will befall you, and it is then that you will know my power.”  I’ll admit that I was amused watching those suitcases being lined up neatly by the front door.  When you’ve lived in New York for as long as I have, you know that watching a solid foot-and-a-half of snow pile up outside in less than 24 hours isn’t going to bode well for the hyper-oiled machine of New York City’s infrastructure, particularly during a major holiday.  They weren’t going anywhere.

Sure enough, we awoke the next morning to the news that JFK International Airport was entirely closed, with no chance of re-opening until at least later that evening.  Soon the fam was re-booked on a flight leaving in 5 days, and the luggage became slowly, steadily unpacked again.  Surely many people would get out the liquor the minute they received word their families would be marooned beyond their welcome.  And sure, we got the liquor bottles out and everything, but I couldn’t have been giddier to have them for some extra bonus time.  We got to keep the party going, and the blizzard monster wound up being the best Christmas gift I got this year.  I got a Firehouse full of my favorite people in the whole world, and when this family gets together, you can be sure that good food and good drinks are bound to happen.

One of the best things that happened during this time was all of the freshly-baked homemade bread we were making and eating.  The catalyst for this was most definitely my beloved boyfriend, who has gotten very good at Jim Lahey‘s infamous “No-Knead Bread” recipe.  He (awesomely) had loaves in progress virtually non-stop in the kitchen, and then I got involved and we started making ciabatta loaves from the recipe in Rose Levy Beranbaum‘s “The Bread Bible,” a book I have mentioned before on this site, and completely swear by.  By the time the holidays were over, we’d probably banged out a solid 6-8 loaves of ciabatta.  Not all of them were great, but they did get better and better with each one, and I’d say that now I’m pretty confident in my ability to get it right.  (Thanks blizzard monster for all that extra time indoors!)

This is a great bread to practice as a bread-making beginner, as I fully profess to be.  First of all, it’s a very rustic bread, so you don’t have to be a perfectionist about the shape or anything.  Second of all, ciabatta has distinctive characteristics, such as those big, beautiful air holes and a super-crispy crust, so it’s easy to know when it’s right and when it’s wrong.  Ciabatta is also wonderfully versatile.  It’s my first choice of bread to serve with a yummy charcuterie or cheese platter, it’s great for sandwiches, and makes awesome croutons and breadcrumbs when it starts to get a bit stale.  And let’s face it, there is little better in the world of simple pleasures than a kitchen full of freshly-baked homemade bread, no matter what kind it is.

Here’s to family, love, yumminess, and a peaceful and prosperous 2011 all around.  Happy New Year readers!

Ingredients:

For the dough starter:

1/2 cup plus 1/2 tbsp. unbleached all-purpose flour (NOTE:  I used King Arthur brand.)

1/16 tsp. instant yeast (NOTE:  Amount is interchangeable with active dry yeast if that’s what you prefer to use.  That said, I really suggest the instant stuff.  I have had a lot of success with it during my initial forays into bread-making.)

1/4 cup room-temperature water

For the dough:

Just barely under 1 cup of unbleached all-purpose flour

1/4 tsp. instant yeast

1/2 tsp. kosher salt

1/2 cup room-temperature water

Olive oil

Extra flour for sprinkling

Instructions:

*Note that this particular recipe involves the use of a Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixer, or the like.  (Hopefully someday I will be sure enough of my bread skills that I will be able to adapt this recipe for the food processor, but until then…..)  Note also that you will also need to start the process of making this bread at least 10 hours before baking it in order to have the appropriate results.  You will probably need to make this a few times before you find a timing sequence that works for you, just as I did.  The good news is that those first few tries are also great practice, and you will get markedly better at making ciabatta in the process.  Remember that nothing about making this recipe is particularly difficult, it’s just a lot of latent time and a lot of “knowing what to look for.”

1.  First, make the dough starter, which needs 5 minutes of your time immediately, and at least 6 hours and up to 3 days of latent time after that.  In a small non-reactive bowl, combine all of the starter ingredients and stir the mixture by hand at moderate speed with a wooden spoon for 3-5 minutes until smooth and everything comes away from the sides of the bowl.  The mixture will also be slightly sticky if you touch it with a finger.  (NOTE:  I found it helpful to actually set a timer the first few times I did this, which sounds a little silly, but so does the suggestion to hold the wooden spoon close to the bottom, which I also recommend.  Seriously, both of these suggestions will help.)  Cover the bowl tightly with plastic wrap and set aside for at least 6 hours at room temperature, until tripled and filled with bubbles.  After 6 hours, stir the mixture down quickly and store in the refrigerator for up to 3 days, removing it to room temperature 1 hour before proceeding to the next step.

2.  Next, mix the dough.  Set up the mixer with the paddle attachment (the one that looks like this), and dump in the flour and yeast.  Turn the mixer on low for a few seconds, just to incorporate the two ingredients evenly.  Add the salt, water, and all of the dough starter, and again turn the mixer on low for just a few seconds to get all of the flour wet.  Then, turn up the speed to #6 and let ‘er rip for 3 full minutes, and then reduce to #4 and keep going for another 2 minutes.  (NOTE:  Again, I set timers every step of the way.  And if you sit there like a nerd like I do and watch the dough evolve through this mixer process into completely different states, you’ll understand why.)  Turn off the mixer and, using clean hands, smear a medium-sized non-reactive bowl with a light coating of olive oil.  Detach the paddle attachment and use it to lift the dough right into the prepared bowl.  Handling it gently, make sure all sides are coated with a thin layer of the olive oil, and then press down gently with your fingertips until a relatively even surface is created.  Cover with plastic wrap and allow to rise in a warm place until tripled in size, 1 1/4-2 hours.

3.  Prepare a clean sheet pan with baking paper.  When dough has finished rising, sprinkle a generous amount of flour onto a clean work surface.  Gently and carefully turn the dough out onto the floured surface, trying to maintain as much air in the dough as possible.  Sprinkle the dough generously with more flour on top.  Gently using the palms of your hands, push the dough together from the outside lengthwise sides in, gently tucking the outer edges under each time  (NOTE:  This will create the signature “wrinkles” on the surface of the loaf.  Right now you are looking at the bottom and will flip it momentarily…..), until you achieve a rustic-looking rounded rectangle shape that is narrow between your hands and longer in the other direction.  (NOTE:  Should take about 3-5 tries…..)  Once the width is about 4″ or so, gently use your fingertips to make large but gentle dimples in the dough, starting near your body and working away from you, elongating a bit away from you each time.  Carefully, gently lift the dough up and invert it onto the prepared baking sheet.  It should be about 10-11″ in length and about 4 1/2″ wide.  If you need to make an adjustment to achieve that size, make it very gently so as to continue to maintain the air in the dough.  Sift a generous amount of flour over the top of the dough and cover loosely with plastic wrap.  Allow to rise in a warm place once again, 1 1/2-2 hours, or until 1-1/2″ high.  (NOTE:  I like to set a timer here for 1 hour.  When the timer goes off, I start to pre-heat the oven to 475ºF, and I re-set the timer for the remainder of the rising time.  Everybody wins.  When pre-heating the oven, make sure to place the rack at a lower level of the oven, and set a baking/pizza stone or overturned baking sheet on top, and have an oven-safe skillet on the oven floor.)

4.  When oven is ready at 475ºF and you are ready to bake the bread, toss a big huge handful of ice cubes into a bowl.  Immediately set the baking sheet directly on top of the overturned one in the oven, toss the bowl of ice cubes into the oven-proof skillet on the oven floor, and immediately shut the door.  Bake for 5 minutes and lower the oven temperature to 450ºF.  Bake for 10 minutes more at the lowered temperature, and then turn the pan 180º, moving as quickly as possible so as to keep the oven door open for the shortest amount of time possible.  Bake 8-10 more minutes, or until crust is a beautiful, deep golden brown.  Turn off the oven, prop the door open with a wooden spoon or folded kitchen towel, and let the bread go another 5 minutes.

5.  Remove bread from oven and place on a wire rack to cool completely.

Yield: 1 slipper for a very large-footed lady