
“A salad is not a meal. It is a style.” -Feisty, chain-smoking New York-based writer, humorist, and iconic trend-setter Fran Lebowitz

“Here, taste my tuna casserole and tell me if I put in too much hot fudge.” -Legendary American film-maker Woody Allen as Larry Lipton in his 1993 film Manhattan Murder Mystery

“I have to quit these peas. Peas are no good for me, I better try corn or beans.” -Stephen King, American master of horror, fantasy, and suspenseful writing, in his best-selling 1994 novel Insomnia

“We have so much in common, we both love soup and snow peas, we love the outdoors, and talking and not talking. We could not talk or talk forever and still find things to not talk about.” -Actress Jennifer Coolidge as voluptuous trophy wife Sherri Ann Cabot in Christopher Guest’s hilarious mockumentary Best In Show

“Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast.” -Oscar Wilde, 19th century Irish trouble-maker, playwright, author, and style icon

“Everything you see I owe to spaghetti.” -Legendary Italian screen goddess Sophia Loren on her beautiful figure

“I don’t care what they say, kale is a good garnish, I don’t think it’s ready to anchor a meal.” -Jesse Tyler Ferguson as Mitchell Prichett on the popular ABC comedy Modern Family

“Very well, I will marry you if you promise not to make me eat eggplant.” -Colombian author Gabriel García Márquez in his celebrated examination of the complexities involved in matters of the heart, Love In The Time Of Cholera

“Yes the world may stop and the world may spin. It’s all the same to the clam.” -The brilliant and prolific children’s book author (among other things) Shel Silverstein, from his beloved collection A Light In The Attic

“It’s not everyone that can say that he has had cholera three times, and cured himself by living on red pepper and brandy.” -Arthur Conan Doyle, Scottish doctor, writer, and creator of fictional detective Sherlock Holmes

“One grain of sand. That’s all that remains of my vast empire.” -Doe-eyed Childlike Empress, the fading, heart-broken, actually-very-old ruler of Fantasia in Wolfgang Petersen’s 1984 film adaptation of The Neverending Story

“Once, in college, I pooped my pants a little bit at a Country Steaks all-you-can-eat buffet and I didn’t leave until I finished my second plate of shrimp.” -Tina Fey as the lovable Liz Lemon, lover of junk food and Star Wars, on NBC’s consistently funny hit comedy 30 Rock

“Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.” -George Carlin, American comedian, potty-mouth, and mentor-from-the-future

“The hen is the egg’s way of making another egg.” -Victorian-era thinker, amateur evolutionist, utopian, and writer Samuel Butler

“Fine, let’s take a vote. Who wants fish for dinner?…Yeah, democracy ain’t so fun when it f*s you, huh?” -Retired radiologist Sam Halpern on his son Justin’s famous Twitter account “Shit My Dad Says”

“I think that what we actually need, of course, is a little more dirt on the seat of our pants as we sit on the front stoop & talk to our neighbors once again, enjoying the type of summer day where the smell of garlic travels slightly faster than the speed of sound.” -Harvey Milk, revolutionary American politician & first openly gay man ever to be elected to public office in the state of California

“Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower.” -Albert Camus, 20th century French Algerian writer, revolutionary, absurdist, and Nobel Prize for Literature recipient

“It was a meal that we shall never forget; more accurately, it was several meals that we shall never forget, because it went beyond the gastronomic frontiers of anything we had ever experienced, both in quantity and length. It started with homemade pizza – not one, but three: anchovy, mushroom, and cheese, and it was obligatory to have a slice of each.” -Peter Mayle, British writer and ex-advertising industry drone, in his famous book A Year in Provence

“Three tomatoes are walking down the street: a Poppa tomato, a Momma tomato, & a little baby tomato. Baby tomato starts lagging behind. Poppa tomato gets angry, goes over to the baby tomato, & smooshes him…..& says, “Catch up!” -The radiant Uma Thurman as Mia Wallace in Quentin Tarantino’s classic 1994 film Pulp Fiction

“Aaah, a marriage made in heaven. A frog and a pig. We can have bouncing baby figs.” -The Muppet Show’s wind-up Robot Kermit, who, unlike real Kermit, openly showed his affection for Miss Piggy

“I know I’m an acquired taste – I’m anchovies. And not everybody wants those hairy little things.” -Tori Amos, American pianist, singer, composer, lyrical master, and fellow redhead

“I believe that all anyone really wants in life is to sit in peace & eat a sandwich.” -American writer & actress Tina Fey as alter-ego Liz Lemon on NBC’s 30 Rock

“It is almost as if happiness is an acquired taste, like coconut cordial or ceviche, to which you can eventually become accustomed, but despair is something surprising each time you encounter it.” -Lemony Snicket, pseudonym and alter-ego of American children’s writer Daniel Handler

“The time has come,’ the walrus said, ‘to talk of many things: of shoes and ships and sealing wax – of cabbages and kings.” -Lewis Carroll, British author, clergyman, mathematician, and photographer, from his classic book Through the Looking Glass